1. A gift for your spouse so that he/she/it can clone you, if things go badly at the office tomorrow.
2. A chance to sprinkle your own DNA very far away from the crime scene. In a way that conclusively proves you weren’t there at the relevant time.
3. A little memory aid, just in case you experience a vacant moment in the middle of reciting your chromosome pairs. If this is you, please don’t come to that party on Saturday.
Or.. something. Anyway, since we’ve established your motive (you can tell that I’m all about the second reason) the vampirewear.com web site offers you detailed and, for all I know, accurate instructions on how to sample, isolate and contain your own DNA – all so they can sell you a stylish vial to keep it in. See? Stylin’.
This nugget of academic dementia was thrown through the Secret Laboratory’s skylight by Jean Roth.